Orgy of the Dead

THE WORST HALLOWEEN movies EVER!

Tonight: Orgy of the Dead

. . . Yeah, it’s porn.

Admittedly the title is misleading in that it is not an actual orgy. It is more of a burlesque or strip club of the dead because there is no sex.

The basic story, for lack of a better word, is about writer is taking his girlfriend to a cemetery so he can get inspiration for his writing. He ends up driving off a cliff. I think. The couple wakes up and discovers they are at a cemetery. The . . .Lord of the Dead? Is entertaining himself by having the dancers dance for him, and if they displease him, they will be banished to damnation. They watch from the bushes for a while, until the wolfman and mummy catch them and tie them up for sacrifice or something.

We see various dances from different cultures and styles, all with the most cultural insensitivity possible. Until we get to the bride who killed her husband on their wedding night. Then we get the most HILARIOUS “white people” dancing. It is just all the stupidest 60’s dances. We also get a cat dance which is a halloween cat costume with the chest and butt area cut out. Which is weird.

Just as the Ghoul Lady(the woman who acts as the Lord of the Dead’s assistant) is about to kill the writer’s girlfriend the mid day sun suddenly comes up and all the monsters turn to skeletons. And then the couple wake up back at the crash site, suggesting it was all a dream they shared.

Yeah, the plot is stupid(one reviewer pointed out it is essentially the same plot as Cats). The acting is GOD AWFUL. Outside of watching the Amazing Criswell again, there’s not a lot to get out of this movie.

Tomorrow: We’ll be watching a classic movie of fearmongering, Reefer Madnes!

Hang on, the paper is folded over. . .(unfolds the other half of the paper)

REEFER MADNESS, THE- WHAT?!?