This Week: Aquaman

You will believe a man can talk to fish.

I genuinely enjoyed this film. Yes, I eye rolled several times during this film, but nothing breaks the film.

I think DC does well when they focus on one character and tell that story instead of trying to cram all the characters into one film.

Except Man of Steel. F*** that movie.

So if they start building up these single character films and then maybe put them all together.

YOU KNOW. LIKE WHAT THEY SHOULD HAVE DONE THE FIRST TIME.

King Orm is a decent main villain. His story is somewhat compelling and the interplay between him an Aquaman is pretty decent.

Black Manta is a lot of fun. I would have changed it up a little, but in the end I liked him a lot.

I forget that his most unique power is his ability to communicate with sea life. And by that I mean that other Atlantean’s cannot do that. And they are all surprised he can do this.

Even though Batman figured it out. Alright, point for Batman.

I do not approve of the toilet humor in this film, but they restrain it to just two jokes. One more literal than the other.

So check it out, I recommend if you want a good DC film, this one is for you.

Next Week: On the Basis of Holmes and Vice

This Week: Mary Poppins Returns

Well, we finally got the sequel to Mary Poppins that apparently someone out there wanted. And of course because it is 53 years after the original, it is going to be hit or miss.

I would say it was a hit, but only because they fired the arrow, then painted the bullseye around it after it landed.

Emily Blunt is FANTASTIC, as expected. There is no one in this that doesn’t do a good job. My only problem is that this is very paint by numbers to be a good Mary Poppins film. They have the real world banking problem, they have the animated sequence, they have Mary Poppins wacky relative that they visit, they have the chimney sweep scene(except this time it’s leeries(lamplighters)), and then the ending kite scene(balloons this time).

I would say there are only two real memorable songs, that being “Trip The Light Fantastic”(which makes me think of the Terry Pratchett novel), and “A Cover is not the Book”(which is pretty raunchy for Mary Poppins). There’s another song I really liked, “The Conversation,” which is a softer, sadder song, but I like it. I just don’t know how it fairs on the “memorable” scale.

In the end, I recommend people see it, because it is very well done, but the only reason I saw it was because my family wanted to see it. Otherwise I would have skipped it and nothing would have been lost.

Next Week: AquaBee!

Tonight: Ralph Wrecks The Internet

(I don’t care what the actual title is)

I only saw Wreck it Ralph once in theaters, and I can’t remember if I was a bug fan of it then. I remember finding the fix it felix and the Alien swarm woman story funny, but the actual Ralph story was bland. The funniest part was the references to other video games.

This one is based entirely on internet references. Which can be extremely hit or miss. In this case it just hits a middle. It gets the internet right, but it doesn’t really cause one to burst out laughing, more just a “ha, I get it.”

Also any movie that explores the internet and is PG is missing the best jokes.

I think the best part is the mid and after credit stingers. Be sure to stay after the credits for a sneak peak at Frozen 2!

I would say if you enjoyed Wreck It Ralph, you might like this, but if you weren’t a fan, expect more of the same.

Next Week: Well, I’m sitting in Robin Hood right now, and can’t find any new movies next week, so. . .

Tonight: The Grinch

It was cute, I liked the Jim Carry one better.

(Facebook crashed just before I could hit share on the long review, I’m not typing that in again)

Next Week: Fantastic Widows: The Instant Family of Grindelwald

This Week: Bohemian Rhapsody

I really regret not going to a Queen concert. Even though that is not really possible for me to attend or appreciate at any point in my life.

TIME TRAVEL CONCERTS! THE NEXT BIG IDEA!

This movie was AWESOME! You feel like you are at a Queen concert at times. The actors all did fantastic jobs in their roles. The music is amazing. The production is just above and beyond throughout. Honestly if you are a fan of Queen, you will enjoy the hell out of this movie.

There are some bits that are off for me though. Starting out, the band seems to come together ridiculously easily and manage to become famous and popular almost without issue. This might be how it went, but it just seems like we went from no ones to a household name without much effort. This corrects later in the film when the vh1 behind the music tragedies begin, but it seemed weird at the beginning.

Also they play with the timeline at times, as typical of movies like this. The only reason I know this is because we see them come up with “We Will Rock You” AFTER Freddie Mercury cuts his hair and grows the stache, but I know for a fact they were performing that song before Freddie Mercury changed his look.

Finally they include the classic “Sad scenes in the rain” which as a film reviewer I have to criticize it, but DAMN IT they are just so cool!

Anywho, unless you hate Queen and good things, you will enjoy this movie.

Next Time: The Overlord in the Spider’s Grinch

This Week: Kingsman: The Golden Circle

If Kingsman: The Secret Service was The Avengers, Kingsman: The Golden Circle is Age of Ultron.

It is still really enjoyable, and tries to hit some of the same points of enjoyment as the first film, but it just isn’t able to pull off the same surprise hit that the first one did.

Channing Tatum is an excellent addition to the cast, but sadly a bit underused due to being sidelined halfway through. The Red Viper from Game of Thrones actually ends up being the main Stateman liaison for this adventure.

Like Pitch Perfect 2, I’m not sure I am itching for a 3rd one after this. There are possibilities there(practically the same ones at the end of the first Kingsman) however it would really just seem like a stretch. This was a good one to end on, going for three might be a bridge too far.

No after credits or mid credits scene.

Next Week: American Made

This Week: IT

Whelp, back to being afraid of drains.

As someone who had the shit scared out of him from the original TV movie, I didn’t have any real intentions of seeing this movie with the Network Censors taking out of the equation. However after getting into the Dark Tower, and basically starting to reevaluate my stance on Stephen King in general, I was coming dangerously close to wanting to watch this movie.

Then people started talking about how great of a movie It was, I decided to give It a chance.

Before I start my review, I need to preface my history of IT.

I never sat down and watched the Original TV movie beginning to end. I just managed to catch several scenes of the movie as it was on tv when I was younger(probably while my dad was watching). If I did watch the whole thing, I don’t remember it well enough. I have watched the Nostalgia Critic review, which covers most of it, but it is watered down for humor. I tried reading the book once back in the late 90’s, but I didn’t make it very far because I am pretty sure I mentally psyched myself out.

So with all that in mind, I thought this movie was freaking great!

Acting all around was just phenomenal. Best child actors I’ve ever seen in film. They are witty and charismatic and have some of the best line deliveries ever.

I especially love the Badass Boast delivered by Mike from Stranger Things in the climax.

Sharing in the brilliant casting choices is Bill Skarsgard who plays Pennywise and does it amazingly.

Now, the biggest hinderance for me with most horror films is usually the jump scares. Can’t stand them. However, this movie pulls its punches.

With a few tweaks, this movie could have been unbearable. However, instead of jumping out at you, IT goes for creeping inevitably. The jump scares are telegraphed just enough that it is tolerable and makes it so I’m not looking away and keep my eyes riveted on each frame.

Except the projector scene. God damn Fuck that scene!

So yeah, great movie, I highly recommend it, not unbearably scary.

Now let’s see if I can sleep tonight.

Next Week: Kingsman: The Golden Circle

This Week: Power⚡️Rangers

Actually pretty damn good.

If you want to hate it, you can. There are certainly things to dislike about it. It’s a “dark and gritty” take on a show that originally involved heroes in spandex fighting rubber monsters.

Honestly, it is a lot of character building. It is kind of like the Breakfast Club to a degree. All these teenagers who really have no business being together all slowly form bonds over the course of the movie. Whereas in the original show they were just plucked out of nowhere and handed power, they come across the power by chance, but before they can fully use it, they have to earn it.

There are about 4 instances in the movie that made me just shake my head. One of which is in the first five minutes.

Nothing that destroys the film, but just a few “could we please not?”

There are of course, plenty of nods to the original series. Any time there are reboots, they can’t help, but throw in references to the original series. Honestly, they handled them fairly well.

The CGI fights at the end are kind of meh, but not god awful.

There is a pretty neat mid credits scene at the end.

I recommend it.

Next Week: Working at Dominos, most likely.

This Week: Tomorrowland.

This movie needed more cursing.

Honestly, I kept thinking “This would be so much more fun if they dropped a “WHAT THE F***!?” Or “oh s***. . .” Would have just made the movie so much funnier and more fun.

But as it stands, this movie was a lot of fun. I’m glad they didn’t go where I thought they might be going towards the end, but it thankfully didn’t pull that.

I recommend it, though strictly on the basis of there was nothing else I wanted to see this week. If the only other option wasn’t Poltergeist, then I would be seeing that. The trailers did NOT do it for me. It was a lot better than the trailers made it seem, but both movies that came out last week were far more worth it.

If you want a fun family movie, check this one out.

Next Week: Aloha San Andreas! Chris Kyle meets Gwen Stacy or The Rock VS CGI Disaster Movie?

2 Weeks Ago: Hot Pursuit

It was raining and I didn’t wanna go out in that nonsense. And never ended up seeing it. Oh well

Last Week: Pitch Perfect 2

I should have watched Mad Max: Fury Road first.

If you are interested in both movies, and are trying to decide which to see first, see Mad Max first.

For the first 10-15 minutes I was disappointed I wasn’t watching Mad Max. To quote someone who also does midnight movie reviews and was forced to see Pitch Perfect 2 instead of Mad Max “While this is all fine and good, but nothing’s on fire, nothing’s exploding.”

So see Mad Max first.

Then go see this. If you liked the first one, you will like this. The German Team is fantastic. The Bella’s are fantastic. The treble makers get one song and then are relegated to the back because they chose NOT to take on the world. The songs(except for the Treblemakers) are all good and enjoyable. Very funny moments throughout and actually enjoyed Fat Amy more in this than the last movie, but your mileage may vary.

Go enjoy it.

But see Mad Max first and scratch that metal itch.

Next(This) Week: Tomorrowland Poltergeists.